F*CK CASA

Submitted by want2bmoms on Wed, 03/19/2008 - 5:41pm.

You know what? I love when people make descisions for me. When people DECIDE - without talking to me/us that we are not capable of commiting to 20 ?%$#@ hours a month, justs because we are trying - note that I said trying not DOING - to BECOME foster parents. Yes, that's right, we have started the process to apply to be foster parents for ages three and under, and because of that, we can not be CASAs for children OVER AGE THREE. WHY???? conflict of interest or some other bullsh*t they pulled out of their @$$es... Although, there are other foster parents in the program (who like us, do not have placements right now - we would not get placements for @ least 6 months.), in fact half of the class has MULTIPLE children, AND full time jobs.
US??? No jobs for either of us, no other commitments, no children, haven't even been accepted to potentially be foster parents. Oh yeah... Did I mention that we are lesbians and my DW is in a wheelchair?.... Hmmm.

F^ck them.

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I am a bit confused here.

Submitted by on Mon, 03/24/2008 - 1:37pm.

I am a bit confused here. Do you mean you have not been able to make all the classes? Neither of you are working? Are you financially independant?

we made all the classes,

Submitted by want2bmoms on Sun, 03/30/2008 - 6:16am.

we made all the classes, after talking to the trainer for Foster Care - who basically told then they were being rediculous, 60+% of couple drop out of fostering because it's too much work, and her director doesn't haave a problem as long as we aren't CASA's to our foster kids or their sibling - , they "let" us graduate (but they are gong to wait until we "decide" to let us take a case. ie, no cases until we have dropped out of foster care or decided to not take any kids in)
No, we aren't wealthy are anything like that, my DP is in a wheelchair and needs a full time live in aide, which is me, the state chooses to pay me to do this because if they didn't, I would have to work out of the home and they would have to pay either for 24/7 nursing care, or for her to live in a facility. (which wouuld make everyone miserable, because the only thing wrong with her is that her legs are well, ...incooperative... and she is oppinionated and stubborn and alert and strong and educated...). But I don't consider it a "job", I have been raised that family takes care of family...

wow just reading your

Submitted by on Fri, 04/04/2008 - 1:01am.

wow just reading your comment i think someone would be scared to give you foster kids....

.

Submitted by want2bmoms on Sat, 04/05/2008 - 1:27am.

As a foster Parent

Submitted by on Tue, 04/08/2008 - 1:32pm.

I am a lesbian and a foster parent. I was also a foster child when I was a kid. So I know more about the system than anyone person should. It soulds to me that because you have a disbled partner that they don't want to put any more on you than you already have. They want to make sure that the children that are placed are taken care of and are not put in to a situation where they are unintentionally neg. I don't know what state you are in, but if you and your partner are registared domestic partners, than I am guessing that it is not because you are Leasbian. My partner and I have actually become the experts on gay and Lesbian childern some how in our area. The system really doesn't care what you do in your bedroom they just care if the children are going to get the best possible care.

I agree!!

Submitted by want2bmoms on Sun, 04/13/2008 - 6:18pm.

I don't think it is the lesbian issue. What got me is that the CASA people are the ones with the issue, not Social Services. I think that part of the issue is that they don't want to have to think (literally, they assured us that CASA training would be accessible and that they would make sure there were no problems... then held 7/12 of the training upstairs in a building with no elevator/lift...) they don't want to have to work with my DP's physical difficulties because it might change the way they have to do something (in fact, we had to go get a ramp and provide it for the duration of the training, so that they wouldn't have to move their training to the -available- classroom (downstairs) because then they would have to move the tables - which they had to set up every week before class anyways...).

the point at which the lesbian thing came into account is when on the day we went to do our "exit interviews" and mell told M, the girl doing her interview (who was very concerned aboutme having to take care of my own family when Mell needed to CASA), that she was my own family, we were partners, and that wouldn't be an issue. M said that she suspected that and it was ok... Of course two days later we got a call from the (very conservative) director of the program saying that "she knows we have other things we need to do that night and, well, why don't we just skip the swearing in ceremony and not have to worry about it?" (you should know that in order to take a case you HAVE to be sworn in by the judge).

See, these guys aren't really part of the "the system" they are a group of volenteers from a nationally based volunteer program... Who we haven't heard from since swearing in.

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I do COMPLETELY agree with you about the system not caring, our caseworker/trainer is great and training for foster care kinda rocks my socks. We are super excited to get "our" caseworker (I am hoping that we just get to keep C, who has a caseload and is a trainer, she's just so easy to talk to) and have our homestudy done. (We are in CO, btw. & no dom partnerships) She's really excited that we didn't have picture perfect lives growing up (even thought neither of us were in foster care -although I will be the first to say that I should have been, in fact, all three of us at home should have been) and that we have seen where these kids might be coming from... She was also very fast to assure us the neither DP's disability, nor the fact that we were in a relationship was going to be a problem, then told us that "they have six other same sex couple who are fostering, at least one of which has also adopted, and "numerous" fp's who have both physical and mental disabilities and as long as they are being handled and not affecting hte children's care, it is a non issue!"

So, as a foster momma, 1) what do you have the kids call you? and 2) give us all your best advice on getting started! (we are taking birth - 36 months - either gender)