{"id":3667,"date":"2009-08-31T12:59:27","date_gmt":"2009-08-31T12:59:27","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2009-08-31T12:59:27","modified_gmt":"2009-08-31T12:59:27","slug":"a-surrogate-s-story-i-believe-it-s-an-amazing-gift-to-have-a-child-so-why-not-help","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/proudparenting.com\/2009\/08\/a-surrogate-s-story-i-believe-it-s-an-amazing-gift-to-have-a-child-so-why-not-help\/","title":{"rendered":"A surrogate’s story: ‘I believe it’s an amazing gift to have a child so why not help?’"},"content":{"rendered":"

Robyn was a surrogate who took part in a panel discussion about surrogacy at the fifth annual Men Having Babies<\/strong><\/a> seminar. <\/p>\n

The conference is offered every year for gay men who are considering biological parenting. The event includes advice from legal and medical professionals – and personal stories from parents and surrogates. Robyn took some time to answer a few questions from us.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Thank you for sharing part of your surrogacy story with our members. Are you a mother? If so, how many kids do you have? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I have one daughter who is 7-years old.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: How old were you when you decided to become a surrogate? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I decided that I wanted to be a surrogate when I was 16.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: How did you learn about surrogacy?<\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I first found out about surrogacy in 1996, I started researching adoption laws and other options for having children. I don’t remember what or how I found the information but remember thinking how great it was to be able to have children through this process.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: What path did you take to learn more about it? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: It took a few years before I started learning more and it was primarily the internet that I used to gain my knowledge about surrogacy.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: How old were you when became a surrogate? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I was 28 when the process began and 29 once I delivered.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: How many times have you been a surrogate? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I have been a surrogate once.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Did your age affect the timing of your surrogacy experience? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: My age did not play a role in the timing but making sure I was done with my family did.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Did you meet any opposition from friends or family when deciding on becoming a surrogate? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I knew from the days of researching that some people would not agree with my decision or even the concept of surrogacy, so I chose my words and people carefully while discussing and going through the surrogacy process. I did have a few people not too excited but still supported me anyway.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Some women don’t want to help gay men become parents. When did you first consider helping a gay person with surrogacy? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I never thought about helping a gay couple until the agency asked me if I was willing to work with such a couple during my screening. Once they mentioned it, I said it did not matter as long as they were a committed couple who truly wanted a child – not just the next step in life – and could care for the child in all aspects especially love.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Were you a surrogate for a single person or a couple? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: I was a surrogate for a great couple in NYC who are just amazing.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: How did you first make contact with the parent(s)? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: The agency matches us then we had a phone interview which preceded into them meeting me in person.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Did the relationship status of the parent have any influence on your decision to match? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: Very much so, seeing how they interacted with one another, with people in general and such tells you so much about how they will be together and with a child. I wanted to help a couple who truly wanted a child and desired to have a family of their own.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Can you list 3 reasons you became a surrogate? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: My love for kids and I believe it’s an amazing gift to have a child so why not help? Adoption is very difficult in the USA, gay or straight – and my number one reason [since I was sixteen] was because I worked with one of the most loving ladies in the world but was unable to have children. During the six months I worked with her she had lost two babies – due to the girls changing their mind last minute about giving up their children for adoption. I knew there had to be another way to have a child in your life, so I made-up my mind once I found out about surrogacy.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Do you intend to pursue surrogacy again? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: This has been the biggest question asked to me… I am not going to pursue surrogacy again except with my previous couple if they chose to have another child.<\/p>\n

PP<\/strong>: Do you have any advice for women who are considering surrogacy? <\/p>\n

Robyn<\/strong>: Have a support system and do it for the right reasons… Emotionally she needs to have her head in the right place so there is less problems with attachment and such.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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